[....And suddenly, this feels more personally familiar.] ....What do you mean by that, that you 'didn't want to', [he asks, confused.] ...such things as this... ...what were you doing, before, that you would already feel you should be prepared..?

[He is no fool. He is well aware of his age, and the ages of his fellow 'lancers' at home. They were children blindly running into war, on enemy ground, attempting to do what adults had failed at.

And it showed.]