Lambert would be the first to agree with that, but traditions are like habit -- hard to break once you've gotten used to them, because they make life simpler. If the Carnival ever brought Vesemir here, it'd make for some interesting times.

"I don't want to talk to myself while you touch my belly like you're a midwife checking to see if the baby's turned," Lambert says. Congratulations, Scout, you now get to treasure that mental image of Lambert as an expectant mother.

"If it's going to take a while, I might as well meditate. Can't hurt, maybe it'll go faster." It's worth trying, at least.