There's a long, uncomfortable silence from Childermass before he answers that. He can easily guess what Steven might be thinking. It's because of him that his Portland self suffered such a terrible fate, on the Rose Queen's orders. Throwing him to the Summer Court had just been another way of protecting himself in the end, even if he did try and make amends later.

Will he do it again here? Betray his fellows for his own life?

"I don't want to," is his answer that ends the silence. He can't quite look at Steven, either, instead focusing on the board. "But I don't know if I'll have that choice."