lostcarnival | Closed

Closed | D15

Who: Yuya and Strange
When: D15
Where: The carnival
What: Post-Portland Paranoia
Warnings: Discussions of trauma, kidnap, torture likely. The usual.

Nightshade was at the concert.

Gongenzaka told him, because he was worried too. He was part of the patrol, so he'd take that information to every important source, probably. Yuya's less worried about what she wants with the carnival, or Wismuth, and more what she wants with one specific person.

So he goes to look in the morning, skipping breakfast to show up at Strange's trailer door with his staff in hand. He's not as harried as when they escaped the manor, but it's hard to completely smooth out the worry in his brow.

He knocks rapidly. "Mr. Strange? Are you in there?"

He really hopes he is.

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Strange nods at Yuya's assessment. Probably all of them. After all, why would the fae care about a bunch of changelings? Everything Strange has heard says that the Ringmaster was an anomaly just because she treated them decently.

Though at Yuya's statement, Strange gives him a little frown. He just said that he wanted to kill Nightshade, he's not going to settle for 'leave him alone.'

"I don't want her to just leave me alone," Strange remarks, a little irritated. "She hurt other people in Portland and will inevitably hurt other people that aren't at the Carnival. She's a horrid little sadist and I want her dead."

"I know, but..." He sinks his head further into his hands, squishing his cheeks a little in his grip as he looks back at Strange. Strange's dramatics are just enough that he doesn't take 'I really want her dead' as seriously as he could be. "It's not just her, it's Arcadia. They have to change, they have to be stopped from invading anyone's homes, or hurting people. But it's not as easy as saying it, is it?"

Yuya didn't really meet Nightshade personally. He just knows what he saw at the ritual, and what she did to Strange. Still, awful as she is, it's not as simple as just taking her out of the picture. Even when he dealt with Academia, he couldn't just turn around the hearts of every solider--those in charge had to change. Or be taken out.

"More fae... and others who are as strong as them have to stand against it."

It isn't that easy. How does one change an entire civilization? A drastic action that nobody could overlook. Strange did that when he broke the mirrors of England, opening up magic to the rest of the world. Well, can't really do anything of that level here, not to the faeries. Eroding it over time. But how long would it take for that to happen in the first place?

Strange sighs, obviously a bit more annoyed with himself than with Yuya, as he leans back into a childish pout. "I hate this sitting around and talking about things," he grumbles. (Who's surprised, absolutely nobody.) "I thought I knew what to do but apparently all my plans are 'idiotic' and 'might destabilize all of creation.'"

He's physically making the air quotes as he says that...but alright, even Strange can see a bit of humor in a plan so dumb it might have destroyed literally everything. The pout lessens, as he smiles slightly.

Yuya smiles, just a little ruefully. He feels the same way about talking instead of acting. But what can they do? Yuya doesn't have any better plans.

"Yeah," he sighs dramatically, reaching for another potato chip. He stops before he reaches the bag, however, something weighing more on his mind.

"But if you ever want to talk about something..." He takes a single chip, pressing it between his fingers until he hears a small, satisfying snap. "It's a lot easier to bear, I think. After you tell someone else."

The offer of someone to talk with makes Strange smile slightly. He reaches over to the chips before just straight up taking a handful.

"Only if you do the same," Strange adds in, with a little nod. Popping a chip into his mouth, he starts talking with his mouth full. "We've all gone through so much nonsense here, after all. And I know it's hard to talk about some of it with certain people."

Example A: the small list of things Strange knows he won't tell Childermass.

"I will," Yuya pouts. "But I asked you first."

Because Strange turned this around on Yuya last time, which just distracts from the reason that Yuya's offering: because Strange is still clearly messed up because of Nightshade. Yuya has friends he'd tell anything to, so he's not exactly hurting for outlets for his emotional problems.

...wait, so he actually has to talk about this? Strange pauses for a moment, as if just not saying anything will cause the conversation to change. It doesn't.

Urrrrrrrrgh.

Strange briefly gives Yuya a little pouty glare before he starts explaining and offering up some honest insight. "I think...it's the fact that I can't do anything about her that annoys me. If there's a problem or something in my way, I should be able to solve it. But I can't do anything about this."

At least, he can't do anything without screwing everyone over (again).

Yuya drops the broken chip into his empty cup, dusting off his fingers just as Strange finally starts talking. If he's affected by that pout, he doesn't show it, although his own expression slips into something less confrontational.

"Maybe you can, it's just the way to do something isn't how you're thinking about it now?" Strange, after all, has very extreme feelings about this. Not that Yuya blames him for them at all, but he knows what it's like to get clouded by believing so strongly in something that you think your one approach is the right answer.

Strange has extreme feelings and a one-track mind. How is he going to solve a problem? Magic. What has provided absolutely useless at solving this problem? Magic. Still, it's not like he's dealing with Nightshade right now and right at this moment: he can at least entertain the suggestion of 'try something different.'

"All of the plans the Ringmaster shot down involved magic. I doubt asking nicely would work, I'm not good at subterfuge, and I can't outright stab Nightshade. I could ask another fae for help, but I've no idea when we'll run into one again."

And, of course, Strange's track record with the fae is absolute garbage. Maybe that's what he needs to do first, get a few metaphorical wins under his belt.

"That's... not really what I meant." That's honestly not even close to what Yuya meant, which is: maybe the ultimate solution is not first-degree murder.

Nightshade isn't just a problem, she's a person--there's only so much control you can really have in that situation. And it's really hard for Yuya to tell if Strange should be looking at the smaller or bigger picture, here.

"What's the real reason you want to... you want her dead?" Really, it sounds like he almost wants to kill her personally, but Yuya's not going to entertain thoughts of that level of aggression.

"If she enthralls me again, I'll hurt people I care about," said with a very pointed look at Yuya. Strange doesn't have to say 'remember when I tried to murder you in Portland' to get the point across that's what he's thinking of.

There's a whole host of other factors: if he's enthralled again, she might go for his soul, the Ringmaster might not help, he might not see Arabella again. But those are all what-ifs and maybes sprung from Strange's paranoia, things the he knows he can't deal with and yet he worries about anyway.

It's one of the least traumatic things he's dealt with since joining the carnival, but not one he's forgotten. He folds his arms on the table, leaning against it.

"I know. Something like that is really scary, right?" He understands Strange's fear, because he's had it himself. Definitely with a different origin and context, but it still haunts him the kind of damage he was able to do when he lost himself under the influence of Zarc. "Even if it's not your fault... it still hurts."

He smiles faintly. "But you're not fighting her alone, and we're not going to let you walk all over us if it comes to that."

At least trust them to fight back, half the carnival is OP magic users.

He does trust them to fight back. Strange even wrangled a 'dude, please just murder me if I get brainwashed again' promise out of Lambert. But it's the simple fact that he might get enthralled and hurt people again that Strange is terrified of happening. He's also aware of the fact that Portland him was really, really lucky there was a convenient mission that the Rose Queen wanted her lackey and her lackey's lackey to take care of. Otherwise who knows how long he'd be stuck in Nightshade's realm.

Still, Yuya talking about how they're going to fight back brings up a different point. "Others might not let me walk all over them. You're going to help protect people," he gently bosses. "The carnival's rubbish at defensive magic and if a High Fae shows up, they'll need all the help they can get."

That Strange considers Yuya capable enough to be specifically asked to protect people makes him swell up with pride, and he rapidly perks up with a grin. "Yeah, of course! That's what I'm doing this for!"

The magic, obviously. Strange has great appreciation for magic for the sake of magic, but Yuya's investment is truly just for one goal. And that's enough for him, because with the kind of trouble they get into it's a worthwhile one. "Uh, not that we're going to let her have you that easy! But when you're scared, remember you're not alone. We're ready, too."

"Perhaps if we're all ready, then we'll manage to think of something when the time comes." What that something would be, Strange doesn't know. Still, they've got time to think these things over.

Strange takes another bite of a chip before standing up, stretching slightly. "You know, I've seen that staff at work with your warding. Mind showing off what it can do with the barrier?"

They have time. Maybe less than they hoped, but they have it. And Yuya really believes that, if not for everything else, they can at least be perpetrated for Nightshade. They all remember what fae are capable of.

Yuya blinks and looks up, sitting up when Strange changes the topic. "Oh--yeah! I think it's the same, but stronger?"

He pushes out of his seat, grabbing one last chip before making his way to the door. "I bet it'll take a lot more force this time!"

Strange gets up as well. He's not making any effort to clean up, he'll just get to that later. Syr won't mind, right? He'll get to it eventually.

Yuya's confidence makes Strange grin, as he looks down at the kid with a smile.

"There's only one way to find out!" Strange remarks, with a little laugh. "Let's see what you can do!"

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Closed | D15

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