CONFRONTATION

[dorkypantsuit]

Who: The Psiioniic and Joker
When: Day 91
Where: Joker's Trailer
What: Pay attention to me.

He'd been waiting outside Joker's trailer for most of the day. He did wake up later than most of the other workers, so he wasn't surprised that Joker was gone by the time he came over. In fact, he'd been expecting this. He had a water bottle and a snack and he intended to wait for the stage manager as long as it took. He couldn't say with certainty that Joker was purposely avoiding him, but he was pretty sure that Joker was purposely avoiding him. When all else failed, force a confrontation, right? Joker would have to come back to his trailer eventually and when he did Psi would be waiting for him.

Comments

[pipers_son]

The one topic he's been trying to run away from.... Regaining his balance, Joker stiffens his shoulders but still keeps his gaze away. "I ain't pissed off," he manages to force out, even as every bit of his body is on edge. Confronting things isn't something he likes to do, especially when it comes to himself.

"I'm just tryin' ta get some space ta myself, alright? It ain't anythin' personal."

[dorkypantsuit]

How was it not personal? It wasn't like he was avoiding anyone else's company. Or was he? Thinking about it, he wasn't sure who else Joker hung out with besides his performers. His family maybe. Was he avoiding them too? Joker's whole body is tense, like he's struggling against a fight or flight reaction. Psi's shoulders slump.

"Jeez... I'm not gonna beat you up or anything. You don't have to look so tense."

What was Joker so anxious about? What was he avoiding by avoiding Psi? It didn't make sense to the Psionic, and it was making him lonely too. Joker was probably one of the few people at the carnival he could actually just feel normal with. Someone who wouldn't get annoyed or thrown off by him saying or doing ridiculous shit. He needed that distraction now, after the vampires, more than ever.

"Why do you need space now? What's the reason?" he's staring at Joker intently waiting for the answer, willing for the human to meet his gaze, to tell him honestly what the problem is.

[pipers_son]

He's tense? Dammit.... Joker forces out a breath from between his teeth. He just can't help it... He doesn't want to have this conversation. To explain anything. All he wants to do is get back into his trailer, help get Feathers something to eat, and then spend some time outside for once.

God, he's tired.

But he can't get out of this without some sort of answer, can he? Squeezing his eyes shut, he tries to think of something. "Just...." He has no idea what to say, trailing off before sighing. "No one wants ta be seen when they're like that, Psi." An explanation shouldn't have to be given, he wants to think.

[dorkypantsuit]

It actually takes him a minute to realize which 'like that' Jokers talking about. The first thing his mind lands on is 'naked,' but he knows there is absolutely no way that can possibly be what Joker's talking about. Still, if he excludes 'naked' and 'happy' from the list all he's left with is 'sad,' but that can't be it either. Who would feel weird about somebody seeing them cry? Sure, it was a little embarrassing to cry in public, but that hadn't exactly been a public place. And why avoid the Psionic because of that? It's not like he was going to tease him or something. It wasn't like avoiding Psi made the crying not happen! It would be absolutely and completely off the walls bonkers for that to be what Joker is talking about. And still, it's the only possible thing Joker could mean.

The conclusion to this thought process leaves him feeling disturbed, and he looks at Joker as though he's just grown a third head. Did he really mean...? But what else could he mean? It just...

"Are you... Joking?" But he wasn't. He looked so serious and tense. He clearly meant what he was saying and that, that made the Psionic mad.

"Are you insane?"

[pipers_son]

Something about his tone scrapes at him, and his temper snaps. Jerking his head to glare at Psi, he bares his fangs. "Not everyone likes scraping up old wounds," he hisses, wings flaring out more. "Or bein' reminded of 'em."

How does he not get this? It drives him up the wall that Psi is so oblivious. Frustrated, he keeps going, hand fisting at his side. "Ya always do this- no one asks ya to poke yer nose inta things, but ya do it anyway."

[dorkypantsuit]

The remark doesn't even sting Psi thinks it's so off base. The thing that he's responding to the most being Joker's body language and tone. His own wings stretch out, small though they are. Whether Joker is intentionally trying to look imposing or not with his wings stretched to their fullest, Psi doesn't know, but he certainly isn't going to respond as though he's intimidated. He steps forward, glaring at Joker and gritting his own fangs.

"Sorry for trying to help people?! Is that what you want me to say?"

He hardly ever even tries to pry with Joker. He didn't even pry that night, just letting Joker not talk about whatever it was that was so clearly bothering him. He still doesn't even know what it was that lead to the other veteran's emotional meltdown in the woods that day. But he sure as hell had seen him the next day, smiling away as if everything was just peachy fucking keen.

"You know what? You're a fake- a phony! You act like everything's normal even when you're really the most miserable person here! And now you can't get over the fact that somebody saw you crying!?"

He cups his hands around his mouth in an attempt to amplify his voice before turning away from Joker to shout into the groove.

"Hey! Guess what everyone, turns out Joker has some real fucking feelings after all!"

He turns back to Joker although he's still practically shouting.

"Shock of the fucking century I know."

[pipers_son]

Psi might as well have hit him for how that shout makes him flinch back, expression contorting into a grimace. Any other day, out of context and with everything removed from it, he probably would have found it funny. Of course he has feelings. That's nothing worth yelling about, is it?

...But there is context. And he hates every bit of it.

A fake... Ha. Of course he is. Sometimes, it kind of amazes Joker that more people don't realize it, or don't call it out. Back in England, at least, it wasn't so strange among his family. What they did was horrific, monstrous, and yet he was always able to keep smiling for them... But in the carnival, things can get so much worse, and no one's really questioned it to his face so far. Well, maybe they, too, know better because they're doing very much the same, and he thinks of Strange in particular.

But you know what? It's a damn good system and here, with Psi yelling at him. Joker still isn't sorry for using it. All he's sorry for is that the moment he let it down is when he got caught. And he's aggravated that, even now, Psi won't let him just get over it on his own pace.

They're not kind, the words that roll through his mind, and the feelings that accompany them don't feel good, but he doesn't care. All he does is take a slow deep breath as he looks straight into those mismatched eyes. The expression he puts on is one he's worn a thousand times before, as a butler, when he had to overseer monstrous things and say nothing: distant and flat and cold.

"Then I suppose," he says, accent easing up clear and slow, "that I was miserable all those times with you, wasn't I?"

And with that, he reaches up to touch one of the charms tied to his antlers... and disappears.

[dorkypantsuit]

He startles, stunned by the disappearance, and then forced into action because of it. He sparks red and blue in frustration and hurt. Could he blame Joker for saying something like that after what he'd just did? Probably not, but that he'd even lightened his accent, just so he could be sure Psi understood. He growls, the sound a bit like a swarm of angry cicada's before he shouts out around him

"Coward!"