a med tent party! [semi-closed]

[flashover]

Who: The Blue Exorcist crew and anyone else who might be in the med tent. Like Herbert maybe.
When: Day 59 — after the Elysium
Where: Med Tent
What: Shiemi has arrived in the Carnival, and Rin runs to make sure she is safe. Turns out just about everyone else has done the same. MEGATHREAD GO!
Warnings: None for the moment! Will edit if needed


[Rin only has to hear that Shiemi was in the carnival to get motivated. Sure, he’d just woken up from his forced nap after unceremoniously passing out due to exertion. Sure, he’d just been sassing the Rose Queen just a few hours ago. He’s still fairly tired, but he has to see her. He has to make sure she’s alright.

He runs into the tent, throwing open the flaps and calling out]

Shiemi!! Shiemi, are you here?!

[in his rush, he completely forgets who else might be at the med tent]

Comments

[reflash]

[He's moving fast but that doesn't mean that he knows what he's doing.]

Nii-san.

[Yukio's breaking out the lecturing voice, the one loud enough to stop Rin in place, or make it obvious that Rin is running away.]

[flashover]

[Rin stops, and flinches; his tail goes stiff and the fur frizzes a bit.

He stands near the exit of the tent, saying nothing and facing away from Yukio]

[reflash]

Where are you going? [Yukio's tone hasn't changed to anything more friendly, and his expression doesn't seem to indicate any possibility that this is going to be a friendly chat. More "Okumura-sensei" than "Yukio".]

[flashover]

[Rin remains stiff and doesn't turn to face his brother, but he grabs the tent flap in his hand and balls it into a fist, pulling it taut]

To the cookhouse, probably. People are hungry. I have a job to do.

[reflash]

Are you all right? [He means physically.]

[flashover]

I'm fine.

[physically, at least]

[reflash]

Good.

[He has to do something. Yukio has to be the polite one, the nice one, the one who reaches out a hand to make things better.

He hates this.]

I had a question for you, if you don't mind. [And he's trying to make himself sound like it isn't a big deal, because it isn't.]

[flashover]

[You don't have to. You really don't have to do anything, Yukio -- you're the one who wanted to pretty much never think about family again.

Rin hates it just as much.

A cold, uncomfortable feeling rises in his stomach, like an icy hand grabbing his guts and twisting.

"Yeah, I mind!" he wants to snap. But he doesn't]

... 'Kay.

[reflash]

[Yukio knows Rin. He knows the set of his shoulders, the tone of his voice. He knows Rin doesn't want to be here.

Maybe he shouldn't be doing this. Maybe it would be better not to talk to Rin again, or wait for Rin to start things up, or try and fix this situation by throwing himself straight into another conversation that neither of them can handle.]

It's actually about your demonic features. [If he keeps his tone light, and Rin keeps facing away, and no one else in the tent looks over here, Yukio could pass for someone having a normal conversation.]

How do you sleep without hurting your tail? [Which might sound like an odd question, especially since Rin hasn't seen Yukio's full set of changes. Yukio keeps getting his caught in weird positions and waking up with his tail all pins and needles.

The claws are harder to deal with, especially right now, when he has to force his hands not to curl more tightly into fists, when he has to make sure he doesn't rip through his skin.]

[flashover]

[Rin would rather be anywhere than here. He'd rather be neck deep in Holy Water, half naked in the snow, pierced with a thousand needles, chewing on glass... anything. And there's no hiding it, not the way Rin wears his heart on his sleeve.

"About his demonic features?" Yeah. Right. Rin glances at Yukio from the corners of his eyes, then rolls them back forward to stare at the ground in front of him. Real smooth, bro.

... But at least it's an easy topic. One that has nothing to do with their Other Problems unless you squint.

His tail swishes instinctively as he thinks about it. He huffs and turns to look at Yukio properly this time]

I sleep on my side or my stomach and not on my back, and usually I let it hang off the bed. Sometimes I still wake up and it's been in a weird position all night... Not sure why it matters to you, though. [he never cared about Rin's tail before, except how to hide it from the other students at first.

And no, Rin has literally not seen Yukio since noticing they were the same sort of alien creature on that space trip]

[reflash]

I keep hurting mine in my sleep. I didn't think it would be this inconvenient. [His tail is low behind him, but off the ground. The tuft of fur at the end is puffed out, and even the short fur along the tail is raised. He's more on edge than his deliberately calm expression would show, and it's probably obvious to Rin (even if everyone else in the room wouldn't catch it). He's making an effort to look calm, to stay polite, to keep his voice level, to not punch Rin in the face.]

[flashover]

[Hurting... what? Rin's eyes drift downward and he finally spots it, and those same eyes go wide for a moment. A tail, almost identical to his, except there seems to be something sharp hidden in the tuft.

Just like him, but more dangerous. Sounds about right.]

... Oh. Uh... well... I see. [he gives Yukio a good once over, but there don't seem to be any other changes. He looks back out the tent flap] You get used to it, eventually. There's no special trick to it.

[reflash]

I would have asked you earlier, but I haven't seen you in over a month. I almost thought you'd finished your contract, nii-san. [His tone doesn't change. He doesn't sound angry, he isn't scolding, he's just staying nice.]

[flashover]

Mmm. Nope. Not the case. [he kicks a small pebble on the ground, though it's more like he flicks it away with one of his dextrous toes] The last thing you said to me was that you wanted me to get out of your sight, so... I've been staying out of your way. [God forbid he mess up again. But hey! Apparently, even doing what Yukio asked is messing up!

As he thinks about it, tears sting at the corners of his eyes again. Nothing he does will ever be good enough, will it?]

[reflash]

That was your choice, nii-san. [That was Rin's choice, it was Rin's choice to stand there and say "I'm leaving" after Yukio said "Don't go". What was he expecting? What reaction did Rin honestly think he'd get after that?

Yukio can't keep the smile up. His hands curl into fists and his claws bite into the skin of his palms. If Shiemi and Shima weren't here, this would probably have devolved into a physical fight already.]

[flashover]

[Rin finally turns to face Yukio and opens his arms in an exasperated gesture]

What do you want from me, Yukio? What do you want?! You said you didn't want me to go, to not leave you alone, but you kept pushing me away and acting like you hate me! [he's raising his voice now, and it's cracking with emotion, but that emotion isn't anger -- it's frustration. He had found that weird book, that seemed like it might be about Yukio and him... but it didn't tell him anything he didn't already know. He couldn't change the person he had been]

[reflash]

[What does he want? What does he want?

Yukio has no idea.

Rin's yelling, which means everyone is going to notice them, and Yukio can feel their stares cutting into him from behind.

What does he want?

He forces his hands open, feels his claws slide out of his palms and already knows how he'll bandage those later, once his hands aren't grabbing at Rin's shirt. But right now, he's angry, and his voice is louder than Rin's, and who cares if everyone is staring? Who cares?]

I don't know what I want!

[flashover]

[And here they are, back to the same place they left off in Wismuth, when Rin had run away. Run away from this exact same situation.

But there wasn't really anywhere to run away to, was there? There were only so many places to hide in the Ringmaster's realm. They couldn't keep doing this. Couldn't keep almost coming to blows with Yukio's bloody hands wrapped into Rin's shirt.]

... then what do we do?

[reflash]

[Isn't it obvious that he doesn't know?

If he had an answer for Rin's question, they wouldn't be here right now.

His shoulders slump as that burst of anger burns itself out, and Yukio finds himself staring at his own hands as they start to throb with pain.]

... I don't know.

[The admission doesn't make him feel any better.]

[flashover]

[Rin exhales and then looks at Yukio's poor palms. It's something that he's done more than a few times thanks to his own claws, but Yukio didn't have the same healing factor that Rin did.

There's a clean cloth in reach, and Rin grabs it and puts it in Yukio's hands]

... I guess we can't just keep avoiding each other, though.

[reflash]

[Yukio swipes the cloth across his palms, and presses it (hard) against the worst of the cuts.]

No, we can't.

[flashover]

[Rin just sighs]

So we know what we can't do... but no idea what we should do.

[reflash]

[Isn't that just his life? A constant stream of "no, you can't".]

[flashover]

[yeah well, at least Rin is here with you, now]

... We'll figure it out. Together.

[reflash]

[He hates this, he hates that Rin sounds so confident about the idea, that it's even something being suggested, that there's anything to figure out.

Mostly, he hates that he can't agree with Rin.]

At the very least, we should work on getting along here.