[closed]

[dontpokethat]

Who: Ginko and assorted people
Where: Various locations around Portland
When: Late Week 3 and early Week 4
What: After trying to kidnap a child, getting kidnapped himself, and having his face set on fire, Ginko has a lot of catching up to do.
Warnings: talk of aforementioned face-burning probably, others tba as necessary

[Prompts below!]

Comments

FOR PSI - right after rose burning

[dontpokethat]

Ginko is pretty quiet throughout the process of retrieving his car and getting back to Psi’s apartment. He knows perfectly well that what happened wasn’t technically his fault, but… that doesn’t mean he’s not pretty unhappy about it all.

He finally speaks up when they get inside, looking up sheepishly at Psi. “So, uh. That… happened.”

[dorkypantsuit]

The quiet during the car ride had been tolerable. The demon hadn't known what to say and had been distracted by his own thoughts. Normally around Ginko he didn't hold anything back, now he was subdued. He could tell Ginko was uneasy, probably reflecting on everything that had happened that day. The demon didn't want to upset him with his brash behavior or crude jokes, so he stayed silent. He knew it was strange for him to be so worried about what others thought of him. He had never made a practice of caring about those sorts of things in the past. Now things were different. The idea that Ginko might think poorly of him made the demon feel nervous and afraid. This feeling, it was like something was moving in his stomach. He wanted to impress and please in a way that was completely foreign to him.

He wondered if this was what Ginko meant when he said love. If so, the demon wasn't sure he liked 'love' all that much. It made him unsure. Sometimes it even made him feel like a fool. Other times though, it was the opposite. The past week he had felt better than he ever had before. It wasn't just happiness or any kind of sexual attraction. It was that he felt like being with Ginko really made him better. He thought about his actions, he saw things from a different point of view. He was thinking things through and actively wondering how things would look from another person's perspective or how it would effect them. It was something he'd never thought to do before, and he now realized that if he'd been this way from the beginning he could have avoided so much disaster. Sans would be talking to him and Ginko would never have been caught or possessed.

Did Ginko blame the demon for not noticing what was happening? He feels like an idiot all over again. He should have noticed something was different. He should have questioned Ginko more, or forced him to see Zecora. He doesn't want Ginko to blame him, so he stays quiet. He spends the drive caught up in his thoughts and questioning his feelings. It isn't until they walk through the apartment door that he realizes how wrong he is. It's the sheepish look that clues him in. It was the way Ginko looks at him as though he'd been caught doing something wrong. In reality nothing could be further from the truth. Ginko was the victim in this situation, just like Sans had been a victim, like Amethyst, like Steven, like every changling he knew. And yet in spite of this reasoning, Ginko surely disagreed. It mad him angry, and sad, and guilty. Once more, just as before, he felt the suffering of another as his own.

This was his failing, the reason he was considered a failure to his race. It was his weakness, but... It wasn't. His brows knit as he suddenly remembers something important, something he hadn't even realized he'd forgotten. It wasn't a memory, not really. It was closer to an echo, his own thoughts bounced back at him rather than a specific moment from his past. It was an echo where the silence in between sounds had been so long the original phrase had been all but forgotten. His feelings weren't wrong or a mistake. He wasn't a mistake. He didn't have to play their game or be who and what they told him to be. He remembers dark grey lips smiling at him from beneath a hood that shone pink and green in the moons' light. They were the same weak smiles Ginko gave. Afterall, wasn't it these 'wrong' feelings that made him so happy to have someone like Ginko by his side?

He's quiet, caught up in his thoughts as he is, and watching Ginko as he does so. Silence linger, maybe even to the point where it grows uncomfortable. The demon doesn't realize or care. He reaches out to put hand on Ginko's shoulder, expression serious in a way it rarely is.

"I'm the same."

[dontpokethat]

Ginko has just started to look away, unsure if he should have said anything at all - then he feels Psi's hand on his shoulder, and looks back to him, blinking.

"...What?"

[dorkypantsuit]

"I feel the same." For some reason it's hard to say aloud. His certainty from only moments before wanes. "I mean, you're blaming yourself for what happened."

That wasn't actually what he'd wanted to say, but at least it was actually related to what Ginko said. The demon thought it was true to. Ginko hadn't said he blamed himself yet, but for some reason Psi was certain that was the case.

"I was thinking I should have noticed something and blaming myself too."

[dontpokethat]

His gaze drops to the ground, brow furrowing as he thinks that over. He wouldn't say he blames himself, exactly, but-- for all he knows, maybe if he said how he did feel about it, Psi would consider that to qualify as blaming himself.

Somehow, he feels like this has been an issue before. At what point is he really 'blaming himself'? Should he expect other people to look at it differently?

That's not the issue at the moment, though. He turns to face Psi and sets his hands on his shoulders in turn, looking him in the eye. "It wasn't your fault. I... I think that spell was meant to keep people from noticing - it's just lucky that Foster did."

[dorkypantsuit]

He actually only looks more uncomfortable at seeing Ginko look him in the eye like that. He flushes, looking down. It was nice that Ginko was trying to reassure him, but to be honest he didn't feel too bad. He did feel bad, but it was just a temporary feeling, a reminder to do better in the future.

"That's... Sorry, that wasn't actually what I wanted to say." He takes in a breath before looking back to Ginko. As uncertain as he feels, this is definitely something he wants to say.

"Remember what you said before? That you thought you loved me? Well... I think I might feel that way too."

He swallows nervously, still not positive on all this, but forcing himself to move forward regardless.

"What I mean is, I think I love you... Is uh, is that okay?"

[dontpokethat]

That... was not what he was expecting. At all.

In fact, for a few seconds, Ginko can't respond at all. He just stares up at Psi, wide-eyed. Then he breaks into a smile, nervous but genuine, like he can't imagine that he really just heard what he heard, but-- he really hopes he did.

"That's... that's more than okay."

FOR ZECORA - after the rose burning (around October 18th-19th)

[dontpokethat]

Over a week after their last conversation, Ginko finally shows up to Zecora’s clinic. Perhaps unsurprisingly, he’s… not looking great. Besides being visibly exhausted, there’s gauze wrapped (somewhat clumsily) over his empty eye socket, and he’s actually managing to be more avoidant of eye contact than usual.

“Uh… hey.” Then, after a moment’s pause, “You did tell me so.”

[zebrarhyme_everytime]

Zecora sighed, motioning him back through the door to an exam room. "I wish I had been wrong. How much of what happened are you comfortable telling me?"

[dontpokethat]

"Um..." Ginko follows her readily, his hands shoved into his pockets as he thinks it over. It's probably best that he tells her as much as possible, but-- he'd rather not go over some of it, honestly.

"Well, it turned out the fae had, uh... planted a rose in my eye? Which was why I was... acting strange." He supposes that isn't much of a surprise. "A friend managed to track me down, and, uh... burned the rose out."

There. That's the short version.

[zebrarhyme_everytime]

"Burned it out in what way?" she said, holding the door to the room open and motioning her in. None of this surprises her too much; she's had a few cases involving fae magic before.

On that note, she leaned over to her desk to grab a lockbox, before she stepped in after him.

[dontpokethat]

"Uh, well... with fire." He frowns, thinking over what he remembers of what happened. "I, um... guess he used a lighter or something. Wasn't paying much attention to that at the time."

Okay, sorry Zecora, that's a lie - or at least the part about thinking Foster used a lighter is. But he can't tell her his true suspicions.

[zebrarhyme_everytime]

"If that is true, I'm afraid you will need further treatment, but -- may I undress it?"

She needed to redress it anyway, more properly, and examine the wound for any number of reasons, but asking was polite.

FOR JOKER - late week 3

[dontpokethat]

With the whole rose situation behind him, Ginko is… well, not actually feeling great. It’s fully sinking in now what’s happened, what he did. He knows perfectly well, of course, that it’s not as if it was his decision, but… knowing he’d been used like that still isn’t a great feeling.

Of course, one of his go-to ways to handle stress has always been to go for a walk. It’s comforting to be able to go out and walk around, usually with Miu alongside him. So, that’s what he’s doing today - wandering the park, watching his guinea pig snuffle around. He’s got his hat pulled over his head and his bangs shoved over his left eye as usual, but it still might be possible to see the straps of the medical eyepatch under his hair.

[pipers_son]

"Ginko!"

And there's a familiar voice Ginko probably hasn't heard in a while.

Not that radio silence from Joker is unusual- he does have a charge to take care of and that sometimes means all manner of things from watching over him when he gets sick or any other kind of thing. Usually, however, it doesn't mean coming up looking like utter shit as if he hasn't slept for a month. A cross between relieved and worried is stretched across his face.

"Yer okay! I heard that somethin' happened at the Sanctuary, but I've been-" He grimaces a little. "Busy."

[dontpokethat]

"--Oh, Joker! Hey." Ginko looks the usually more put-together angel over with a concerned frown. Man, he's looking rough.

"Yeah, things were... kind of tough for a while there." Look, if Joker doesn't ask, he doesn't need to know in detail about how Ginko got kidnapped by fae, mind controlled, and had to have a plant removed from his eye with fire. 'Kind of tough' is at least close enough for now.

"What about you? Did you... get what you were dealing with worked out?"

[pipers_son]

"Yeah, ya look like shit," Joker says, a little more blunt. At least in his defense, he's absolute garbage mentally. "Still, yer alive, so, ah, big blessings?" Flopping onto the bench besides Ginko, he lets out a huff of air. "With all the shit goin' around, ya never know."

A part of him wonders if he should bring up Psi, or if Ginko already knows that. He kind of wants to whine, just a little bit.

"It's, uh..." Joker grimaces. "A work in progress. I think. Although it outta get better, soon."

[dontpokethat]

Ginko gives a quiet snort; he's not too bothered by Joker's comment, honestly, and... well, it's probably true. “I could say the same about you.” Both as far as looking like shit and being glad he’s still around at all.

“Yeah? Let’s hope it’s sooner rather than later, then.” He slumps back against the bench with a sigh, and adjusts the patch over his eye a little with the hand not holding Miu’s leash. “Better for at least one of us to have his shit together, right?”

[pipers_son]

"Well, the ideal is for both of us ta have our shit together," Joker says, frowning a little as Ginko adjusts the eyepatch. That's.... a new addition.

"Would ya be honest if I asked what happened ta yer eye, Ginko?"

FOR TANYUU - week 4 (after the attack on the circle)

[dontpokethat]

So it’s kind of seeming like this past month has been… less than great for pretty much everybody. Ginko is used to things being less than great, and just riding it out (maybe almost dying a couple times? He’s not sure at this point) but this is a long time of stuff being, let’s face it, pretty shitty.

Staying with Psi has helped some, but at this point there’s someone else he feels like he’s got to go see - for a few reasons.

He knocks on the door of Tanyuu’s apartment.

[fourthscribe]

Tanyuu has been...better. Between loosing contact with Ginko again and the disaster that was the attack on the Circle's stronghold, she's been feeling more helpless than ever. Much as she tries, she just can't ever make any difference in this world, and it's...wearying.

Ostensibly she had been reading a book, with Haruki playing on the floor with a jingly ball he particularly likes, but she'd been just staring out the window for quite a while when Ginko knocks. The sound snaps her out of the dazed thoughts (strange half-memories of ethereal creatures and a cavern full of ancient scrolls) and after a moment she closes her book and wheels her way over to the door.

Seeing who is there catches her entirely off-guard, and she stares at Ginko for a full ten seconds before leaning forward to sock him right in the gut.

"You jerk!"

[dontpokethat]

Ginko spends most of those ten seconds trying to figure out what the hell to say. Eventually, he manages, very slowly, to say "Hey--"

And then Tanyuu punches him in the stomach. Which, since he certainly isn't expecting that, is pretty effective and knocking the wind out of him.

He doubles over and wraps his arms over his stomach, and, after a moment, manages a few words between wheezes. "Okay, that's-- that's fair. Sorry."

[fourthscribe]

Tanyuu's boiling rage disperses just as quickly as it came, and with a small sniffle she rolls forward to wrap her arms around Ginko's shoulders in as close to a hug as their awkward positions can accommodate.

"You idiot. I thought...I was afraid I'd lost you."

[dontpokethat]

As soon as he's caught his breath a little more, Ginko squats so they're lined up better and puts his arms around Tanyuu in turn.

"I'm sorry," he repeats. "I'm... it's been handled. I'm alright now, I promise."

Meaning he knows now that he wasn't before. He considers being in his right mind with some lingering pain to be a big improvement on being controlled by a plant in his eye.

"I'm so sorry."

[fourthscribe]

"Idiot." It's murmured weakly against his shoulder, and try though she might a few hot tears still leak out down her cheeks. For a few moments more she holds on, but she knows this is less than ideal for Ginko's back and reluctantly unwinds her arms.

Tanyuu rolls back to allow Ginko to step inside, wiping her eyes as she does. "Come in. Will you help me onto the couch?"