but all this time i've been chasing down a lie

[dontpokethat]

Who: Ginko and a whole bunch of people (Sans, Joker, Snake, Zecora, Tanyuu…)
What: In the aftermath of Foster’s shitty mushi plot, Ginko isn’t doing great.
When: From Day 90 onward
Where: Medical tent, trailer 13, and menagerie
Warnings: Possible talk of Foster’s shitty reasoning, also Ginko is a pile of depression and self-hatred in a trenchcoat.

Zecora - Medical Tent - Day 90 afternoon

Ginko was unconscious when Tanyuu first brought him in, bruised and scraped from the fight with Foster on top of his already being exhausted. After a certain point, though, he’s just… asleep, and remains that way through the night and well into the next day. The past few days - between the mushi leeching off his blood supply and the lack of sleep from trying to handle the infestations around the carnival and stressing himself out over them - have taken their toll.

Normally, he’d be pushing himself up the moment he woke up, always moving before his brain is even fully awake. But, today, he just lies there for a few seconds, staring up at the ceiling, before lifting a hand to press his palm over his face.

“...Shit.”

Tanyuu - Trailer 13

Once it’s been confirmed that he’s good to go (and he’s promised not to strain himself too much), Ginko and Tanyuu head back to their trailer. Of course, agreeing not to tire himself out more doesn’t mean Ginko isn’t going to want Tanyuu to catch him up on what happened while was out - what happened to Foster, what was being done about the repellent.

The whole time they’re talking, he keeps fidgeting, whether with his sleeves or his hair or just in the form of his tail twisting and lashing around his ankles. “So… things are being worked out, right? Just… that’s all I need to know.”

Snake - morning of Day 92 - Menagerie

By all rights, this should be the best off Ginko has been in the past several days. In a lot of ways, it is; with the mushi situation finally under control, things are more or less looking up - and, since the mushi that had been leeching off his blood are finally being removed, little by little, he should be feeling a lot better.

Should be. He is feeling better of course, but he’s still more tired than he’d normally expect, and getting himself to go back to work when the time comes proves something of a challenge. But it’s not like he’s never had this problem before, and he does get to the menagerie, albeit a little later than usual.

His ears flick forward when he sees Snake already there, and he gives a small wave as he heads over to watch him feed his snakes. “‘Morning. How are they doing?”

Joker - Menagerie

For all intents and purposes, Ginko seems to be settling back into his work as if everything is normal - though he may seem a little more singlemindedly focused on it when he’s working, and a little less focused on anything when he isn’t. Of course, he’s still having trouble bringing himself to seek out conversation outside of what’s necessary, but… that’s probably fine. Even now, part of him wonders if it might be for the best.

Even when cleaning out the enclosures, he doesn’t pause for long between stalls. Clear out the muck, wash what needs to be washed, change out bedding and food as necessary - it’s a simple, easy pattern to keep up. Like walking, putting one foot in front of the other; he doesn’t need to think for it.

Sometimes, not thinking can be a nice change of pace.

Sans - Barn

Breaks… might pose a problem. Theoretically he could just keep working through them, but the opportunity to pause for a while is more tempting than usual… even if as soon as he’s not working he starts wishing he were. He’s used to spending his breaks chatting, wandering around the carnival to visit with coworkers, but… no way. Not right now.

Which leaves one obvious solution. Going back to his trailer would take too long and probably get some questions from Tanyuu if she catches him. So, instead, he just… flops down on a pile of hay in the corner of the barn. He’s slept in worse places.

Comments

[zebrarhyme_everytime]

"Not quite the nicest greeting,
But you didn't expect this meeting," came Zecora's voice, a moment before the Zebra leaned into his field of view. Her smile was genuine, but her gaze professional appraising, as she waited for him to drop his hand so she could check his pupils.

[dontpokethat]

"Mm. That's for sure." He lets his hand drop by his side, but only after a brief check to see if his eye patch is still in place. It doesn't really matter if it is or not; Zecora has seen the permanent darkness in his eye socket before, after all. But force of habit can be pretty strong.

"How long was I out? --And where's Foster?"

[zebrarhyme_everytime]

Darkness was something Zecora had become very familiar with in her time here. It offered its own clues, to those who knew what to look for. Satisfied that he was looking well, Zecora stepped back slightly.

"All the night, much of the day.
As for Foster, I cannot say."

[dontpokethat]

"...Oh."

For several seconds, he doesn't add anything more to that. Just letting his brain catch up to what's going on - and thinking of what could be said next.

Then he sits up, wincing. "Okay. There're... still all the mushi out there, right?" If he's been asleep for that long, he can only imagine how many more mushi must be in the carnival by now.

[zebrarhyme_everytime]

"You'll continue to rest
If you know what's best," Zecora said, all smiling cheer but fixing him with a look that said, quite clearly, her advice was not optional. Sitting up she didn't mind, but running outside in a tizzy won't stand.

[dontpokethat]

Ginko freezes, partway through swinging his legs off the bed to stand up.

"...Alright." He sighs and shifts back to where he had been. He probably should have seen that coming, but it was worth a shot. Now, though, he'd rather not start anything with Zecora.

"How long do I have to rest?"

[zebrarhyme_everytime]

"Until I am satisfied
You're hale and well, with nothing to hide."

Thank you for behaving, Ginko; she honestly appreciated it, even as she drew up a chair to clamber into, the better to patiently regard him from it. A very rare sentiment from Zecora, who generally preferred to move around while talking and treating.

"Not your body. Instead
I worry about your head."

Day 92 then!

[ophidiarex]

Snake likes the menagerie. It's quiet. It's easy. Admittedly some of the creatures are weird, but then again so is everything about the carnival. He's gotten used to his pants-leg being grabbed by a crate of hands (scattering meal worms across it is enough to make them let go) or occasionally being caressed by a wayward tentacle (don't look), and the legged snake is always a pleasure, always has gossip.

He was chatting with the latter creature in a low susurrus of hisses when Ginko made his way into the room. Snake tries not to look guilty, tossing a dead but warm rat into the already-pudgy animal's enclosure before setting it back down. His own snakes are also eating, some of them in their own cages, others who are shyer in covered 5-gallon buckets. Emily is lapping up animal blood in one of the tanks, and hisses low at Ginko.

"'Hello. We're doing well.' says Emily." Snake looks... tired. It's hard to be awake in the daytime, but he manages. There's an umbrella leaning against the door, evidence of how he got here.

[dontpokethat]

"That's good to hear. What about you, Snake?"

Ginko's not exactly full of energy himself, of course, but that won't stop him from checking on his younger co-worker, especially with how little he's actually been in the menagerie lately to talk to Snake.

He glances thoughtfully at the umbrella, ears twitching. "...I hope coming in in the mornings isn't giving you too much trouble."

[ophidiarex]

"'We're used to it,' says Emily." It's a little bit hard to stay awake, especially towards noon, and getting harder, but he can push through yet. It's not something he enjoys, but it's doable.

He stares at the legged snake as it starts coiling around the rat, tiny limbs scrabbling for purchase on the dead creature's fur. That way he can pretend Ginko's not here, that he's talking to himself. "... difficult."

[dontpokethat]

Ginko's frown deepens a little further. He doesn't want Snake to have to struggle to get to work in the mornings, but there isn't much to be done for it until he can be cured.

"I'm sorry you're having a hard time with this. ...Do you think it might work better if I started coming in earlier so you could just take over in the evening?"

[ophidiarex]

There's really no easy way to handle this. Snake shakes his head. Ginko seems tired all the time, he doesn't want to wake him up earlier. Besides that...

"'Easier to stay up than wake up early,' says Emily." It really is, even if dawn is the worst. It makes him so tired...

[dontpokethat]

"Alright, if you're sure. Just let me know if it gets to be too much for you."

Maybe it's unavoidable for them both to be tired, given the circumstances, but he'd rather Snake not end up completely exhausted.

"By the way, is everything going alright with the animals? Sorry I... wasn't around the past few days."

[fourthscribe]

"As well as they can be, given the circumstances." Tanyuu frowns at the slowly heating pot of tea before turning back to Ginko. "We managed to find the remains of the supplies, which weren't completely obliterated. I was able to salvage some of our prepared kit, but the plants all need to be replaced."

Tanyuu lets out a long sigh, closing her eyes and rubbing at her temple. "Foster has already been set his punishment by the Ringmaster, though what the nature of it is, I've no clue. But he is alive, thank goodness."

[dontpokethat]

"Mm... that's good to hear." Replacing the plants will be troublesome, true - but they have some mushi tobacco in the meantime, and nobody ended up dying. Things could be a whole lot worse.

He adjusts his hold on Miu, cradling her carefully against his chest as he sits on the edge of his bed. For once, she's not trying to run off, which he appreciates; it's kind of nice just holding this ball of fluff.

"D'you need help setting out incense, now that we have it back?"

[fourthscribe]

Things could be much, much worse, and both of them know it. But it doesn't mean that what did happen isn't incredibly unfortunate and distressing.

Haruki looks up at Ginko from his nest among a few tiny sprouts of leaves along Tanyuu's tail and buzzes quietly. After a moment he flies up to settle on Ginko's shoulder, nudging the tip of his nose against Ginko's cheek.

"No, I can handle that. I'm sure I can find plenty of willing helpers if I need." The members of the carnival are likely more than willing to do anything she or Ginko says at this point if they promise it comes with relief. "You need to rest for now--at least the rest of the day."

[dontpokethat]

Ginko lifts a hand to pet Haruki carefully, ears twitching at Tanyuu's answer.

"Don't you need to rest, too, though?"

[fourthscribe]

Tanyuu casts Ginko a bland look, crossing her arms.

"I can and will ask people to help me with the legwork needed to take care of things. You would try to do everything yourself even on a broken leg."

[dontpokethat]

"Wh-- no, I wouldn't!" RUDE. "I do have some awareness of my own limits, Tanyuu."

GETS HERE FIVE YEARS LATE....

[pipers_son]

Joker can understand not wanting to think. It's why, when he arrive at the menagerie, he stays quit for once when he spots how involved Ginko is in his work. Maybe it all works out for him, too- he's feeling a bit too tired for his usual extroverted personality with all the recent things that have happened. Not just the vampires, but.... everything.

And he didn't even get to listen to Foster be murdered over the radio. What an unfair world.

Still, while he doesn't say anything, he does follow after Ginko at a distance, just watching him to make sure he doesn't... He has no idea. Faint, or anything. Still, with his appearance and clothing preferences, it's likely easy to spot him ghosting along for Ginko.

IT IS FINE meanwhile i'm sorry about This

[dontpokethat]

It's only because of that singleminded focus that it takes Ginko as long as it does to realize Joker is there. He's pausing in his work, leaning on his pitchfork while he catches his breath, when he finally catches sight of the - in retrospect rather obvious - stage manager.

Should he say something? Almost immediately, he remembers what Psi had told him just the other day. Of course, he knows that it's not like he's going to end up yelling at Joker, but that's not to say he won't find some other way to screw up.

So instead he just stands there like a deer (ha) in headlights, ears drooping.

[pipers_son]

Any other day, and it'd be kind of funny how Ginko freezes up at the sight of him as if he just popped out of nowhere like a ghost. However, with recent events, well... He straightens up a bit, ears flicking upwards in contrast to Ginko's droop and wings ruffling a little bit.

"Haven't been overworkin' yerself, have ya, Ginko?"

[dontpokethat]

So... Joker is talking to him now. But he doesn't know yet if this is "back on speaking terms" talking or just... temporary. Like the last time.

He shakes his head, breaking eye contact as soon as Joker speaks. "No, just... back to it like always."

[pipers_son]

"No offense, Ginko," he points out, "but I've been here for probably fifteen minutes, I think."

So, yeah. He's not really buying that. And he knows you, Ginko.

[dontpokethat]

Ginko's shoulders hunch a little. "...I'm just doing my job, that's all. It's nothing to worry about."

So far as he's concerned, it really isn't. He's just working, and if he's a little more focused on that than usual, that should be a good thing, right?